Going back a few years, I have always known one thing about myself and that is that I love using my artistic abilities and working on creative projects. The first time in my life that I started to draw was as soon as I was physically capable of holding on to a crayon in my little hands.
Mind you, all it was at first was me scribbling and experimenting with different colours to see if I could understand the difference in colour variation between each crayon. It wasn’t until I was older that my mom pointed out, when I was younger, that she had to stop me from potentially ruining all my classic Disney books because some of them had been slightly ruined.
When I was younger I had a raving imagination. When it came to drawing, I hadn’t a care how the drawings looked, nor was I as fixated on my work as I am now. I must have done at least hundreds of drawings or more, but the difference was they were done quicker. There was always something I was illustrating in my head or visualizing, whether someone told me the story of it, I saw it, or it came to my head. Whatever I visualized, I instantly drew. I even went through a phase of drawing big crowds and groups of people in clusters.
About a year ago, I recall my father mentioning drawings that I had drawn for both my parents. They seemed to be significant to him because it displayed a new side to my imagination. Ever since this was mentioned to me, it has stuck in my mind. He told me about the time that he and my mom attended a Peter Gabriel concert. It wasn’t until the next day, when they got back home, that my dad told me all about what the concert was like in great detail. The next thing I did was take out printer paper and all my colouring utensils to start drawing and interpreting my impressions of what my dad had just told me. Even though I wasn’t there to experience the show and he didn’t cover every aspect of what the show was like or looked like, I still imagined on my own the things he didn’t say about the show. Ever since I was in diapers, I have danced to Peter Gabriel’s music.
All through public school, art class was an enjoyable class for me. I was able to try my own different techniques and styles with art. Then when I went to high school I really started to learn about the different art periods, famous artists, the history behind art, and I got the chance to critique the work of artists. This was when I really started to find and see a bigger passion for art that I had in myself. Before high school I didn’t take art so literally. I was just someone who liked to draw, and I drew anything, really.
I’ll admit part of me has lost my inner, creative side, which is really unfortunate to me. However, there are still moments that come up when I break out and I am inspired to write something, draw, paint, etc. I am at a different stage in my life and these kinds of things have lost their momentum. However, I am aware that this is a time for me to do some soul searching. I do believe these passions will slowly, over time, come back to me and give the joy they did when I was a child.